What the heck is this thing stucking in my chest?????

I look to the left

I look to the right

I can feel it

Something is not right

I keep ignore it

Don’t know what to fix

the feeling is bubbling

to erupt from my chest

I keep thinking

What the feeling is all about

But I get nothing

To let it all out

It suffocating me

So much that its hurt

But how to find it

When you don’t know what it is

..douche bag..

"you can be a douche bag sometimes."

Tell me. What will you feel when someone tell you that? Angry? annoyed? sad? lost your pride? Well, for me, i feel all of those.

I know that sometimes i will talk nonsense. But, do you think i want to be like that? To me, creating words and sentences, providing ideas through critical thinking in a mere second and providing something relevant are something that is hard to do. When you manage to do it, it is rude for someone to call you a douche bag. For example, a girl work hard on her test but still fail and someone suddenly said that she is an idiot. THAT we can say common courtesy is not common anymore.

Someone out there please i beg you, please, if you want to call someone a douche bag, give your brain a little wash if that guy or girl deserves the tittle. It is okay to call them that if they are really arrogant and take pride on the nonsense that they tell you. However, if that person looked like someone who is struggle for suitable words to deliver to you, then, don't be a douche bag by calling then a douche bag.

sincerely,
from someone that had been called a douche bag

..Get a New blog for The Adventure..

Peace be upon you..
i have mixed up my post lately. It is quit confusing. I'll make another blog for the adventure.. :D

..First idea for the Runaway..

Peace be upon You..

As i typed my previous post, i felt very eager on how to begin my new route for the Runaway. For a short period, here i am again declaring the idea.

Wattpad

Hehehe! I actually already post my unfinished novel in the bombastic application. Surprise! Well, only a person know about it. And i bet that person will be the one who read this post first. Doesn't matter. Let's talk about the work. That first masterpiece entitled "Found Love In the Rain". But sadly, it is unfinished. Why i don't finished it? Come on People! if i don't have a writer's block, i would have finish it before i post this. I lost the purpose of the story.. SobSob

However, no time to be sad. I have something to cure it! Tadaaaaaa

I'm going to write a short story to cure my writer's block!!

Well, not a happy news but that is not the only idea i've got! As my brain goes up and down the room, i remembered something that i wrote with my friends from the past. It is actually a story that was written in one short paragraph. I don't know why my lecturer want us to wrote it in one paragraph and even worst, she never check it. Doesn't matter. The thing is, the story is quite good. I want to expend it. It will make one hell of a short story. :D

p/s: wanna give you guys a clue. This is half of the paragraph that we wrote.. 

     I remember my memorable experience which leads to an embarrassment yet sweet moment. The moment happened in my home during semester break a few months ago.  On that day, I sat alone in my room with the window opened wide allowed the strong wind came in. I blankly stared at my neighbour’s house. Back then, I had a crush on the neighbour’s son, Lukman who was my senior from my previous school. I don’t know why but his friends always call him Leo even now. Back to the story, Lukman then went out with his motorcycle’s key and helmet. My heart began to beat faster and unconsciously began took out a piece of paper. Then, my hand began to scribble a heart shape with the words “Leo and me”. As I lifted my hand from the paper, a strong wind blows my precious paper away. It flew and circled in the air and landed next to the drain near him.  I began to feel nervous and slowly climbed out of my window to get the paper. I relieved that he did not realized about my action because of the bushes between our houses. As my hand slowly started to reach the paper, it... (What happen next? stay tuned)

     

..Lets Change!..

Peace be upon You.. 

well, i'm officially changing my blog's title to a little more adventurous!! know why? 

I desperate for some CHANGE

There you go! loud and red. I need some change. My lecturer once said to me (my class i mean), he found out that teenagers, beginning from his year until now are actually have similarities which is easily clueless and always searching for purpose in life. To make it simple, have you ever feel disturbed when you do not have anything to do in your life? When you have finished your homework or assignment, a question suddenly popped up in your mind.

What am i doing here? 

You will feel really empty because you do not feel that you live to do assignment or listen to music or wash dishes. 

To tell you the truth, i always feel that way. As i finished reading my book, i will ask myself questions such as 'am i doing the right thing?'or 'what to do after this?' or 'am i missing something?'. I will feel so empty if i don't do something quickly. 

Asking those questions make me realize something. 

Human are curious

yup, that's right. Statement of the year! Human is not a mysterious creature anymore because i lived for 18 years as one. I know practically everything about human. Nah Kidding! a lot i don't know about human. But, human being a curious creature is something that everyone know. Why not? everyone want to learn because they are curious. 

So, what about human being curious has anything to do with me want to change? There is another thing about human that we must know. If they don't have determination, they are doom. Just like me. 

I'm now currently sitting in a room that fill with everything comfortable and there, in my hand, is a smart phone that allow access to wattpad.com and fanfiction.com. Trust me, i can live a month without television and laptop as long as i have my smart phone with me. With internet access of course. 

This is what make me want to change. I use a lot of my time reading novels and fan fiction from my smart phone until I forget about other things that i can do. I want to have an adventurous life! reading novels day and night is not my dream of an adventure. That is why i need a change. 

This blog is actually helping because i usually post my newest project in this blog and i want it to record my adventure from the beginning until the end. 

Beginning until the End

Hope can make this successful. 

  

 

..Take control = Patience + Rational..

My father once said to me that strong emotions like sad, jealousy, happy and depress are actually come from the soul. If you cannot control the soul by being patient, you will lost all the rational and do something stupid.  

For example, have you done anything that you now think it was a stupid act? Does it influenced by strong emotions?

well, i do.  

there was once, i had a crush on a guy. Overwhelmed by anticipation, i confessed. The guy ignored me and i let myself washed the pillow with my tears after back from school. Now, i think back, i find out that my act of confessing the crush and crying till my eyes out was kindda stupid. Those were things that i done because i was unable to control my emotion.  

Now, i learn my lesson. When you are filled with emotion, just be patient and try to think rational so that you will not regret the decision you make. 

..I Want..

Difficult.

That is the adjective that keep popping in my my head whenever i tried to do my works. 

Depression.

This is what my emotion lead me to right now. Who knows undone things can ruined someone's day so much.

Hardwork.

Trying to be someone who has this talent. Trying and trying and trying...

Lazy.

Seem like only this word exist right now. How to make it disappeared?

Determination.

Ahh, i get it. 

#somethingthatiwrotetogetinspiration. :D